A rather different Christmas tradition
Nov. 20th, 2012 11:17 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
barnabas_trumanEveryone knows, of course, that Father Christmas gives presents and candy and oranges to good children, and lumps of coal to bad children. Children that are not particularly naughty but merely somewhat annoying get onions. And if you are really naughty, Father Christmas's henchman Svaarte Petter will come to your house at night, put you in a sack, and haul you off to SPAIN, where you will be forced to wash dishes in a second-rate paella restaurant.
Your only hope of escape is to be rescued by the Basque Resistance. To contact them, you must put extra spices in the paella when the head chef is not watching; the strong smell will attract the attention of Basque Resistance agents. If they succeed in breaking you out, they will help you flee to their secret mountain stronghold in the Pyrenees. You should return the favor by spending some time looking after their sheep and helping them construct hang glider frames out of aluminum framework and wool canvas.
Where do they get the aluminum, you ask? They trade mutton for aluminum with the Sub-Pyrenean Dwarves (whom they also hired to build their strongholds).
And now you want to know why the Basque Resistance needs hang gliders? They use them to swoop down from their mountain strongholds to steal Spanish sheep (and rescue naughty children).
This is the REAL TRUE STORY of CHRISTMAS and should be shared with all tinies you meet. Just in case.
Your only hope of escape is to be rescued by the Basque Resistance. To contact them, you must put extra spices in the paella when the head chef is not watching; the strong smell will attract the attention of Basque Resistance agents. If they succeed in breaking you out, they will help you flee to their secret mountain stronghold in the Pyrenees. You should return the favor by spending some time looking after their sheep and helping them construct hang glider frames out of aluminum framework and wool canvas.
Where do they get the aluminum, you ask? They trade mutton for aluminum with the Sub-Pyrenean Dwarves (whom they also hired to build their strongholds).
And now you want to know why the Basque Resistance needs hang gliders? They use them to swoop down from their mountain strongholds to steal Spanish sheep (and rescue naughty children).
This is the REAL TRUE STORY of CHRISTMAS and should be shared with all tinies you meet. Just in case.
